I'm so very sorry your mother went through this. It was BABY STEALING. And I am also surprised this was going up until so recently...
My oldest sister had her first son at 19 1/2 and her 2nd 16months later. She was living at home, and my parents weren't thrilled, as she hid BOTH pregnancies. It was shocking especially, the first time. The second time around, they were surprised and angry, mostly angry that she didn't just tell them what was going on. Then they got SUPER PISSED when they found out that she had planned on giving her 2nd son away for adoption because she was so scared of coming home with another baby (she had him on the sly...registered at the hospital under her middle name and our mother's maiden name and lied to us about going to an impromptu weekend away..my parents smelled a rat and it wasn't long before they found out what was going on and where she was). They couldn't believe that she thought they'd throw her out with 2 babies, when they hadn't thrown her out with one. They couldn't believe that she really thought they'd be happy knowing their own grandson was being raised by strangers. Those 2 boys are now 25 and 24...some of the lights of our lives. Unexpected, but in the end, not unwelcome. Parental support is so important in cases like this. While they were born in less than ideal situations, giving them away would have been giving away part of ourselves.
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timeasmymeasure
My mother has a similar story from 1967 ...
Date: 2009-03-16 02:23 pm (UTC)*sighs*
I didn't realize that this was still so harsh so recently. That is less than a decade before I had Laurel.
Re: My mother has a similar story from 1967 ...
Date: 2009-03-18 05:31 am (UTC)My oldest sister had her first son at 19 1/2 and her 2nd 16months later. She was living at home, and my parents weren't thrilled, as she hid BOTH pregnancies. It was shocking especially, the first time. The second time around, they were surprised and angry, mostly angry that she didn't just tell them what was going on. Then they got SUPER PISSED when they found out that she had planned on giving her 2nd son away for adoption because she was so scared of coming home with another baby (she had him on the sly...registered at the hospital under her middle name and our mother's maiden name and lied to us about going to an impromptu weekend away..my parents smelled a rat and it wasn't long before they found out what was going on and where she was). They couldn't believe that she thought they'd throw her out with 2 babies, when they hadn't thrown her out with one. They couldn't believe that she really thought they'd be happy knowing their own grandson was being raised by strangers. Those 2 boys are now 25 and 24...some of the lights of our lives. Unexpected, but in the end, not unwelcome. Parental support is so important in cases like this. While they were born in less than ideal situations, giving them away would have been giving away part of ourselves.
no subject
Date: 2009-03-16 04:28 pm (UTC)